The Individually Sovereign NPC

2025-09-09

Something I've thought about a few times before: I'm not sure how people perceive others' perceptions of reality (or realities for all we know). In other words, I am skeptical of a universal theory of mind concept. I think it's seldom understood that in an individual's mind, it is more than likely true that others are also living the same real and vivid experience. I'm inclined to believe this because of the popularization of the NPC cultural phenomenon.

For whatever reason, people seem to treat individual sovereignty as a status game—they'll believe whatever it takes to distance themselves from the herd. Most people seem to do this via petty consumerism. They'll believe that if they have the best or newest or most distinguished version of "The Product", then this gives them a license to elevate themselves above their fellow human. The mistake we make, though, is that many of us have this same line of thinking and as such, fall into a loss of individual sovereignty in pursuit of the status game. Unfortunately, we've also reached a point where ideology itself is consumerized. People wear causes like clothes and it feels as if Nothing Ever Happens.

David Foster Wallace pinned it down back in 2005:

"Learning how to think" really means learning how to exercise some control over how and what you think. It means being conscious and aware enough to choose what you pay attention to and to choose how you construct meaning from experience. Because if you cannot or will not exercise this kind of choice in adult life, you will be totally hosed.

Unfortunately, many do not yield this warning and get totally hosed. People ask themselves constantly: "Why is the world so fucked up?" The question should be: "How am I the one who fucked it up?" To make it a JFK-ism: Ask not why the world is fucked up, but what you did to fuck it up in the first place.

I reflect on this and try my best to understand the constraints of making the right meaning out of my experience. I know that I don't always have it in the front of my mind that I have more in common with others than I might always know, but I'll try to do my best to work within that constraint and remind myself when it matters that I am not the center of my own universe.

For me, the worst way I ineffectually distinguish myself from others is in the act of self-flagellation—a devastating case of poor-me-itis. More often than not I seem to think that suffering is a prerequisite of joy, but I'm trying to get better about that. But one thing I am curious about: is it normal for other people to beat themselves up as hard as I do?